Saturday, May 31, 2014


Good morning world.How many times have you felt like you were cracking up? How many times in your cracking up have you tried to move away from your pain? How many times have you moved?

 How many times have you wanted to. And how many times have you not wanted to go where the wild wind has blown. Okay how many times have you not known why or where you were going? 

In further thought how many times have you stayed once you arrived. How many times  have you been running away from things that followed you that your eyes could not hide from. And how many times have those memories not gone away. 

How many times have you been lost once you got there. And how many times in your cracking up state have you found a home where the grass was not greener on the other side of the mistake . 

Concernedly in relocation, as we are all trying to escape pain we will agree moving on is Not easy.


Jointly in that agreement  you will once more sympathize with my leading lady’s plight as we take another sneak peek into my first novel “At Circles Bend” 

where we will again find Angelica discovering herself disappearing behind her secrets, abuse, and the Arabic black veil. In this transplantation the reader will agree many times they too have hidden away secretly behind their closets jail.

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Yes in this perplexing situation, my leading lady leading the way, is similarly like all of you today hiding away from her tainted past, compounded by the severe problems she cannot hide from in her present. Sadly Angelica like the rest of us  is  constantly haunted by the devouring tribulations of time, fearing yet in faith looking forward to unseen and unknown complications of the future. 

Yes once more Angelica has found moving in general overwhelming and leaving the States going to Saudi Arabia’s shore particularly daunting as we hear her saying….


“In that thought as I was still frying alive I thought about dying too, as the mirror on the wall fell and again had broken into. Of course I asked for a new one, but that request like the one for me to move, or to go back home, or to die was brutally and obnoxiously denied. 

So in that refusal, I sighed as I hung the mirror back, as every time I looked at the new huge crack, I prayed seven more years of bad luck were not coming. Intuitively in the same viewing, it just reminded me every day how cracked I was to be enduring any of that and how cracked up I felt in every aspect of my days.


Understandingly in the same reflection, I noticed that the aquarium had a crack in the side, and that it was secreting pearl beads of water with condensation. Yes that fish holder looked like the sweat I had on my forehead as it seemed similar to my meat head cracking apart too.

Absolutely both my skull and the aquarium seemed in jeopardy. 

Yes as I viewed tidal waves forming on the spray, as tremor pulsations had shaken the fishy water to the point of sloshing over, my migraine was sloshing around in my brain. In that moment while my husband Conner yelled at me some more I had not know if the fish tank or my head was in more jeapardy of cracking.


To me, it was equally harrowing as I jointly anticipated the bone marrow rattling noise vibes well before they happened, and in that expectation of torture coming with arriving anticipation of verbal abuse and of cultural cruelty I started shaking in the expectancy of each. Miserably  I had known in our relocation any moment the fish tank, like my brain, and nerves would explode, as the cracks in each shattered and detonated.


Knowingly in that hostage held situation trapped inside my apartment ( and my marriage) I was unable to close out the firestorm to my soul as my lack of faith penetrated the bricks of my walls along with the cutting sand. Astutely in that finger nailed pulled anguish as I held onto our cracking family tree , 

I thought it disturbingly sad that Conner yelled at me daily before and after our life changing move. In that verbal abuse I wondered what could keep my breaking heart from falling apart?

 Yet I had know the answer to that, because facing in any direction as I was cracking up eyes opened or closed,  I had always known as one of the Star fish in the heaven’s sea, that Jesus alone could fix the cracks in me.” Joslin Fitzgerald


Your Prayer of Salvation


Dear Jesus, I know I have done bad things in the past, and that I have done bad things today, and that I will continue to do bad things tomorrow as I am going along my way.  Yes that makes me a sinner, just like everyone else in the world every day, with all of the bad things I am doing and saying.


So, because I am a sinner I know I need a Savior....


Therefore my sins and my unhappiness are why I have come to you today, as I am silently praying, because I want to be eternally happy, and I need to be forever saved.


In saying that Jesus, I believe that you were born on Christmas Day.  I believe Jesus, that you lived a perfect life that is written down in the Bible to teach me what is wrong, and show me what is right. And I believe Jesus, in your love for me that you died on the Cross to save me from all of my sins day and night. Yes Jesus I believe you died, and defeated the grave as you arose from the dead on the third day. Yes I believe you are Alive forevermore and that you are living inside my heart and soul eternally night and day!


Thus in believing Jesus, you are the Son of God I am asking for your forgiveness for all my sins that I know, and those I do not know that I have committed, including the ones that I will continue to daily wallow in, as I claim in Your Eternal scriptural promise in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit that I am now going to heaven.


Yes I claim in my new faith this very Minute that I am saved, because you died for me on the Cross, and in your arising on the third day, I know I  will not go to my endless grave. In that statement that just saved my life Thank you Jesus, I am now whole since the Holy Spirit lives within my soul!


Therefore in this prayer I believe that I am born again into heavens sight, and in your Biblical Promise of salvation written in the scriptures I have received everlasting life! Thus as I am asking you to change my blind darkness to guiding light you are forever my Savior, Jesus Christ.




Absolutely I pray that you have accepted Jesus Christ as your eternal guiding light, and your Savior today. I know I may never meet you here on earth as we are roaming, but if you truly prayed your prayer, to Jesus requesting forgiveness of your sins, and asking for your salvation you are right now this second saved. And I will see you when we go Away back home!


In saying that I also thank you for sharing in my thoughts and writing as we are going along our way as you are a huge part of my blogs heart.


Therefore in the things that I am sharing I am also honored to share my books with you too as Happily the FIRST contest for my company with our FREE GIVE AWAY IS OVER. My winner has excitedly been notified and accepted 3 of my AUTOGRAPHED BOOKS as her present. BUT, DONT DESPAIR, BECAUSE ANOTHER READER APPRECIATION CONTEST HAS JUST STARTED!


Yes the new contest will end the last of August 2014, and the prize will be an autographed copy of my FIRST CHILDRENS BOOK called  "AN ESCAPING PRINCESS AND A RUNAWAY  PRINCE." Remember All readers who previously entered, previewed, and reviewed, my books in the first contest are in this contest too.


So, to join them for the rest of the fun next year entering is EASY. Just click on the TOP OF MY BLOG that says READER APPRECIATION to find MY HEART that will take you to more information OR go to my web site from here. To find out more information on how you too can join in the fun.


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Thank you also for your prayers and support that you are giving me daily. Please know that all of your sweet encouraging words and sweet emails are Uplifting my life, and my writing, as I too am praying for You while going along my Mary way.

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